Monday, June 27, 2016

Melisandre Monday, Season 6 finale!

I know, I didn't write about episode nine. Even though it was incredibly amazing. The battle, the dragons, the Knights of the Vale. Here's why: I was super sick. I felt terrible. So terrible that I didn't even want to open my laptop.

I know, that never happens.

I'm feeling mostly better now. Certainly well enough to write about the most incredible GoT episode, certainly in this season (yes, even better than BotB, possibly ever.

Cersei & Marjorie
When this episode opens, you spend about ten minutes watching the "previously ons." It's basically antything that's ever happened on GoT. So that tells you, it's gonna be a big one.

We see Cerseit, looking out the window across King's Landing as her lady dresses her in some sort of armor-type stuff and we listen to the bells chime. Tommen, Marjorie, and the High Sparrow are getting ready, too. And none of them looks too excited.

The music at the beginning of this episode was so unlike anything I've heard on GoT. Very modern piano movements to start, as the people file into the Sept of Balor. It's incredibly tense. They start Loras' trial and he ends up with a seven-pointed star on his forehead (not part of Marjorie's plan btw), but Cersei doesn't even show up!

So you know something big is going to happen. Marjorie knows, too, but nobody cares. It's about twenty minutes of stress for the viewer. Lancel follows the kid into the tunnels and sees the wildfire, Qyburn has Pycelle killed by his little birds (I keep telling people that working with small children is dangerous, but no one believes me), and when you're about so anxious that you can't deal with it any more, the music reaches a crescendo and everybody blows up. And not a little. Like, a lot. Like they blow up so thoroughly that there's clearly nothing left.

Tommen's so upset he just pours himself right out the window.

Walder & Jaime
So Walder's thinking he's a pretty smart guy (despite having lost Riverrun and failed to regain it) and everyone's feasting as a pretty young woman makes eyes at Jaime. Not out of the ordinary, right? I'd be making eyes at him, too... although I doubt he'd give me a second glance!

Walder comes over to Jaime to gloat over what, I'm not sure, and Jaime puts him in his place and questions his purpose in life. What value are you anyway, Walder? You're just a yucky old man with sons who wear weird hats. Nobody fears the Freys! Duh!

Sam & Gilly
This section should probably be called Sam and books, given how much attention he actually paid Gilly in this scene. The maester behind the desk was a bit goblin-y as Sam tries to make his little jokes about life being irregular. The dude's not impressed.

But he does lead Sam toward the library. Sam throws Gilly a helpless glance (who knows where she is now) and the maester leads him into the ginormous library. Did this not feel like a scene out of Harry Potter?

And those gold chandelier things are from the opening sequence! WHAAAAT?!

Jon & Melisandre
Melisandre is lecturing Jon about appreciating his childhood when she literally burned a little girl at the stake, which Davos brings to her attention. Davos was awesome in this scene; truly heartbreaking. Anyway, Melisandre has to trot away on her little pony or Jon will kill her. Or Davos will kill her. Or I'll kill her, at this point.

Jon & the North
So winter is here.

And Sansa still might be sneaky. It might be good for Jon to be a little more chatty.

Olenna & Elia
HAHAHA! Olenna cracks me up. Who wants to listen to the Sand Snakes? Not me! Once the little girls finally shut up, Olenna & Elia make an alliance with Varys to support Danaerys. And so it begins: all of the storylines funneling into Jon and Dany. (And maybe Littlefinger; he's wily enough).

Dany & Tyrion
Aw, Dany gave Tyrion a little hand of the queen pin and he almost cried. Which means I almost cried. Admit it, so did you. And then they board their ships and head for Westeros!

What I'd like to know is, she told the Greyjoys to tone it down with the reaving and pillaging and stuff, but what about the Dothraki? I remember her wedding to Khal Drogo; there was more inappropriate stuff going on there than in all the time Theon was away from the Iron Islands. I'd like to see her control that when she gets to Westeros.

Arya & Walder
I was so excited to see this: they resurrected a very old story from the books to help Arya destroy Walder. She chops up his disgusting sons and pops them into a very dense sort of pie. Apparently, Walder is used to eating some pretty rancid food, because he didn't even notice the human meat in his dinner.

And then the girl RIPS HER FACE OFF and SHE'S ARYA! She rips him right open with a smile on her face. And scene.

Except replace father with Mother, brother, and everyone else.
Littlefinger & Sansa
Littlefinger: Ummm, I was wondering, when I'm king do you want to go out sometime?
Sansa: *Pushes her hand against his face* No.

But then Littlefinger, ever the weasel, tries to turn Sansa against Jon.

Ned & Leanna
Bran, apparently thinking that he has PLENTY of time to get past the wall before the White Walkers find him, decides to take a little break to download some info from the godswood tree where his dead Uncle Benjen leaves him.

And it takes us right back to the Tower of Joy! And it's Ned! And Leanna! And the baby! And it's Jon! So R + L = J! So Jon's a secret Targaryen!

But Jon doesn't know any of this, so it doesn't matter...yet.

The North Remembers
And then Lady Mormont stands up and makes all those men in that room feel about six inches tall. Preach it, girl!

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Monday, June 13, 2016

Melisandre Monday, S6, ep. 8: No One

I'm on time with this one. Must be summertime!
Arya & THE WAIF!
This episode made me soooo anxious. I basically spent this entire episode thinking that every person on screen was the Waif. The actress gives Arya milk of the poppy. It's the Waif! Arya goes to sleep. She's the Waif! A guy shows up at Lady Crane's door. It's the Waif! AND IT WAS THE WAIF! So Lady Crane's dead - that's too bad - and Arya is running for her life.

She is surprisingly agile, given her stomach that must look like swiss cheese...or like Jon Snow's stomach... and she dashes through the entire city. The Waif follows her with a Terminator-like glare. (I promise I came up with that on my own, before I read that everyone and their Grandma also came up with the same comparison.) Arya drags her hole-punched body into a dark corner of the city and pulls Needle out from under a blanket. The Waif thinks it's curtains for Arya, until Arya slashes out the little candle and uses her Daredevil powers, acquired early on in this season, to de-face the Waif and stick her on the Hall of Faces. Woohoo! 

And then Jaqen thinks she's No One but she's not. She's Arya Stark of House Winterfell! YEAH! And then she decides to go home. Good for her. Even Jaq'en has to give her a little nod of props.

Cersei & Tommen
THE MOUNTAIN RIPPED SOMEBODY'S HEAD OFF! And Cersei was like, "Yup. I told you so."
Does she only have the one gown now? I think she's been wearing the same thing for this whole season! I guess the High Septon stripped her of all fashion sense. And then Tommen says, "No trial by combat!" and Cersie gives him a dirty look of disappointment, one only a mother could give, and Tommen avoids eye contact all the way out of the hall. Not looking at mom. Not looking at mom.

Tyrion & Co.
So Tyrion, Messandei, and Grayworm are all hanging out and Tyrion is peer-pressuring them into drinking.  They actually loosen up for about two seconds and of course all sorts of trouble breaks loose in Meereen. The slavers are back and they want their slaves! So Messandei and Grayworm undoubtedly learn that fun=bad and they are never to let their guard down again. 
And then Danaeris pops up the day? With her billions of Dothraki, I guess?

Can I just say that I really like Tyrion's beard?

The Hound & the Brotherhood
Seriously, the Hound is totally cracking me up! I love his delivery! It's like now that he's accepted his life, he's a happier Hound...sort of... and he's just lighter. I love every scene with him in it, and I really do hope that the predicted Clegane Bowl will happen, despite the obvious hurdle of the no trial by combat thing. Thanks a lot, Tommen. I was all ready for the Hound to bash the Mountain.
This made me a little sad:

Brienne & Jaime
Brienne sees Jaime in the distance, gallantly astride his horse. Why does she tell Jaime everything? She's so idealistic sometimes. When she says, "Honor compels me to fight for Sansa's kin. To fight you," you can see Jaime gulp. He knows he couldn't take Brienne on his best day. Brienne tries not to cry and then she runs off. 

Jaime gives Edmure a speech about how terrible he (Jaime) is and how he'll stop at nothing to get back to Cersei. Once he takes back the castle, he sees Brienne paddling down the river to leave Riverrun. Everybody gets all choked up and he waves to her and she waves back to say, "Yes, dude, we're still friends." 

So you know that's gonna get ugly.

I'm really stressing about Brienne v. Jaime. It's gonna rip everyone's heartstrings. Let's face it: there are two outcomes. Brienne kills Jaime, because it's the "honorable" thing to do and lives with the knowledge she killed her friend for the rest of her life. Or Jaime kills Brienne, because Cersei makes him, and is completely embittered. Either way, dark days are coming for these two.

To celebrate the Rains of Castamere playing ominously as Jaime led his men into Riverrun, here is a meme. 

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Wednesday, June 1, 2016

White Walker Wednesday? Game of Thrones episode six

I am beat, people. This is our next-to-last week of school, and you know what that's like.

Meera & Bran
So Meera's dragging Bran around in th emiddle of a snowy forest and Bran is absolutely useless. He's having all of these visions: the Mad King, dragons over King's Landing, falling from the tower, the White Walkers, Hardhome, and more. And all of a sudden his eyes blink back and he tells Meera that they've been found by the wights. Meera loses it because she feels guilty (as if she hasn't already done everything for this guy) when a dude with a fireball on a chain comes in and saves the day.

Can I just say that this fireball reminds me of the incense burner the priest uses during Holy Week? Except they're usually not on fire.

So big shock, it's Uncle Benjen! And he serves Bran up a nice, tasty mug of rabbit blood. Just like home cooking. Apparently Uncle Benjen was saved from becoming a wight by the same thing that turns men into White Walkers, which is interesting.

Sam & Gilly
Sam & Gilly are traveling to Sam's horrible home and Sam's giving Gilly the guided tour, including the various tree species available in the region and the fact that autumn is coming. Here's the plan: Gilly has one job. Lie to Lord Tarly about everything. 

We meet Sam's mom and sister, who are charming and sweet, and they sweep Gilly out of her wildling rags in an episode of What Not to Wear, Westerosi edition. And apparently Sam's sister's name is Talla. Talla Tarly. That's unfortunate. 
Gilly clomps with Sam of the neatly brushed hair to dinner and endures the worst evening of her life, probably, which is saying something considering she married her own dad... or grandad... or something. 
Sam talks about things north of the wall, trying to sound interesting, but fails when he explains that the most interesting thing he hunts is squirrels. Gilly tries to stand up for him but lets it slip that she came from north of the wall while Sam rocks back and forth on his seat in misery. So the jig is up. 
Just when you think Sam is going to leave Gilly and run away to Oldtown, he takes Gilly, the baby, and even the family sword. Way to stick it to him, Sam! But now where will he go? The Citadel is a lady-free spot.

Tommen & the High Sparrow
Ol' No-Shoes has managed to warp Tommen's brain but I'm not sure how this works exactly. Marjorie and Tommen play a game of 20 questions, trying to figure out what the other thinks about the High Sparrow before they say it. Tommen says, "He's a lot more..." and Marjorie says, "He is!" That's deep.

So Marjorie's got some sort of game going here, but I don't know what it is. When Jaime gallantly rides up the stairs on his beautiful white horse (the heavily plumed Mace Tyrell having just finished his very ineffective speech, perched precariously on his own horse in the background), you know swooned, ladies! But it was all for nought. Marjorie sold Tommen for her freedom, sans "SHAME" walk. I'm curious to see what the end game is there.
Arya & the Waif
 Possibly the most exciting part of this episode was Arya's. She watched the play, laughed at all the wrong places, and catches the understudy coveting Lady Crane's role. Arya poisons the rum, but Lady Crane notices her and tells her about her own story - similar to Arya's in a lot of ways - and so at the last possible second, smacks it out of her hand and tells her to keep an eye on the other actress, who clearly wanted her dead. 

So now the Waif wants Arya dead,1 or anyway she always wanted her dead, but now Jaq'en said okey dokey. Is it just me, or does it seem like the Waif knew Arya from the past? At least Arya has needle again, and we can all refer to her as Arya and not as "a girl." Yay! I can't wait to see what she does, where she goes, and how she can possibly survive, when every time she fought the Waif, she ended up flat on her back!

Have some fun. Take this quiz. I got Danaerys Stormborn... I guess there's probably more to that then I want to admit.

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